Dear Blank, Please Blank

There is a website (www.dearblankpleaseblank.com) that I love laughing yet. Here are a couple of my recent favorites:

Dear Facebook users,
New Rule: If you wouldn't shout it in a crowded room, you probably shouldn't post it as your status.
Sincerely, the world

Dear Facebook,
It was good while it lasted.
Sincerely, Privacy

Dear Santa,
Define 'naughty.'
Sincerely, Kids Everywhere

Dear Nickelodeon,
Turning talentless girls into terrible singers is kind of OUR thing.
Sincerely, Disney Channel

Dear substitute teacher,
That is my real name.
Sincerely, Mike Rotch

Dear Mr. 4.75 shots of espresso, 3.5 pumps of hazelnut and 2.75 pumps of vanilla, half non-fat and half whole milk, 140 degrees light foam, half an inch of whip cream stirred two times clockwise latte,
For your sake, I hope you're kidding.
Sincerely, Your Starbucks Barista

Dear Men,
If you don't learn to aim, your permission to pee standing up will be revoked.
Sincerely, The Toilet Seat

Dear flight attendent,
Please give me more than five peanuts, this is a 15 hour flight.
Sincerely, starved

I hope you enjoy these as much as I do!